Since launching the Peaceful Digital Parenting Solution in 2016, several parents have come up with objections as to why they chose not to learn more about keeping their children safe online. This post covers those objections – what they are, why they can potentially harm your children, and a fresh new perspective.
Objection #1: Do I Really Need To Know All This?
This is a great question. Almost every article you’ll find in relation to the dangers inherent online ends with the comment that parents are the most important factor in keeping their children safe online. They all tell you that communication is key if you want to have peace of mind when your children are online. But they fall short of telling you exactly how to communicate in a way that will actually get through to your children.
The children who get into trouble online usually know better. They know they shouldn’t be talking to strangers online, yet they do it anyway. They know there is inappropriate content online, yet they watch it anyway. They know they shouldn’t override parental controls, but about 1 in 5 children do exactly that. Your children are intelligent and very tech-savvy, and they know how to get around what you want – or don’t want – them to do.
So What’s The Real Problem?
The risks of being online are significant, and it’s not that easy to navigate around them. The problem is that as with anything else in life, you just don’t know what you don’t know. And when it comes to safety online, there’s a lot to know!
When kids find themselves in trouble online, it’s usually not that their parents don’t care. Their parents may not know what they’re really getting up to, and even if they do know what’s going on they may not know how to deal with it. Being the first generation of parents who were not brought up with technology as it is now, to be raising digital natives (children who don’t know of a world without screens they can swipe and numerous technology devices) is difficult.
It’s a bit like a giant puzzle. Unless you put all the pieces in your children will not be safe online. They may not chat with strangers, but may be hacked into, and be subject to identity theft and/or fraud. They may not be victims of cyber-bullying, but may be addicted to the internet and their technology devices. The risks are there and they’re very real, and most parents have the “It won’t happen to me” mentality, which leaves them and their children vulnerable to numerous dangers online.
How Long Is The Peaceful Digital Parenting Solution?
The Peaceful Digital Parenting Solution is a comprehensive program covering all aspects of keeping your children safe online. It includes 10 fast-paced sessions of approximately an hour each, delivered in bite-sized chunks over a 10 week period. You can find out more about what is included in the Solution in this video.
The reason the Solution is so lengthy is because it contains a huge amount of valuable information. It’s not fluffy and there’s no hype. It just contains the information you need to keep your children safe online. Rather than expanding each session to take the full hour, with most sessions it’s a struggle to fit all the information you need into that hour. At the end of each session you’ll be amazed that an hour of time has passed!
Objection #2: I Don’t Have Time
As a parent you are busy. I get that completely! I have two children of my own and am forever racing around trying to get everything done. I don’t know of many parents who twiddle their thumbs all day, wondering what to do with all the spare time they have.
For this reason, the information you need and that’s included in the Peaceful Digital Parenting Solution is delivered to you in the least possible amount of time. For every hour of information handed to you, at least 10 or 20 times that long has been invested in finding the information from the most reliable sources available, and putting it all together in a simple format that is easy to follow. That’s closer to the amount of time you’d need to spend to find all the information for yourself – and the chances of finding out everything you need to know to truly protect your children online are slim.
If you struggle for time, this is the best way to save as much time as possible learning what you need to know to keep your children safe online.
Time is one of those things that is the same across the board – we all have the same 24 hours every day. When we say we don’t have time to do something it’s more a question of where our priorities lie. It’s not that you don’t have time to learn how to keep your children safe. It’s just that there are other things that you may feel you otherwise need to do with that same time.
Once you acknowledge that there’s nothing more important than the safety and well-being of the most important people in your world, the time factor as an objection simply disappears.
Objection #3: I Can’t Afford It
No matter what the cost of any program is, the words “I can’t afford it” effectively mean “I’m choosing to do other things with the money I have available“. It means that the program, or whatever it is you can’t afford, is not important enough in your mind to spend that sum of money on. Alternatively, this objection is often quoted in replacement of the true objection that lies beneath it. True or true?
As human beings, we place value on the things we pay for. The more we pay for something, the more valuable we perceive it to be, and the more determined we are to get our money’s worth. There’s nothing wrong with this, it’s just the way we’re wired.
If this program was being given away for free, or sold for $100 or so, it wouldn’t be valued. I can guarantee the sessions would not be watched, they would just sit as ‘unread’ files in numerous email systems all over the world. This would defeat the whole purpose of keeping children safe and giving parents the knowledge they need to have peace of mind they’re children are OK when they’re online.
Let’s Put It In Perspective
A few years ago I was one of many people lining up to spend $2K/month over a 12 month period (yes, that’s a total of $24K) learning how to make money online through digital marketing. Each month it was painful seeing that money disappear, and I was determined to get everything I could out of that training. I hung off every word that was spoken, I attended every single webinar held (once a week), and I attended boot camps that were interstate every 3 months. I learned a lot of valuable information during that time.
When I look at that information and compare it with what’s covered in the Peaceful Digital Parenting Solution, even though the latter costs only a fraction of the former in terms of both time and money, it’s clear to me which is way more valuable. Nothing can be more important than the safety and well-being of my children. I know you feel the same way about your children – it’s called being a parent!
What You’ll Save
If you’re not yet convinced, consider what you’ll save by keeping your children safe, happy and balanced online from the start. The Peaceful Digital Parenting Solution is designed for parents of children aged 5-12 years, NOT for teens. The idea is to use the knowledge to PREVENT your children from getting in trouble online BEFORE it happens, not to pick up the pieces afterwards. Prevention in this instance is FAR better than a cure.
When children get themselves in trouble online it can cost both you and them many things. These include:
- Their future career, or opportunities to study. Plenty of educational institutions as well as workplaces are rejecting candidates due to their online presence.
- Their emotional well-being (as well as yours) – at risk from cyber-bullying and nasty forms of harassment online
- Counselling – often required for a significant period of time for children who become addicted to the internet/games, or for victims of cyberbullying
- Alcohol and/or drugs – often what children turn to for help when problems online cause anxiety and depression
- Your relationships – internet addiction amongst other things tears families apart
- Their lives – worst case scenario, countless tweens and teens have suicidal thoughts due to their online activities, not to mention those who are lured into meeting up with internet predators. Many children attempt suicide, and about 1 in 10 succeed. There can of course be no greater cost than this.
Objection #4: Why Should I Trust You?
OK, so no-one has actually voiced this objection, or at least not to my face! But I know it’s there so will address it here.
You’re not going to embark on a new program without trusting the person responsible for its delivery. What makes them an authority on the topic? Why should they be trusted? And what’s in it for them? The first step to solving this one for you is opening up to you about who I am…so here goes!
Who Am I?
My name is Ruth Dearing, and my brand is Peaceful Digital Parenting. I am a devoted mum with two boys, currently aged 8 and 5 years. I came across this topic years ago when one of my sons became addicted to his online games. It has become my purpose in life to share my experiences and knowledge with as many parents as possible, in order to help parents guide their children safely through technology – and ultimately save lives.
Further to the painful but very educational experience my family went through with internet addiction, I was able to help my son to the point where he is able to enjoy the benefits of technology without the pitfalls. There are so many families going through similar experiences. It’s becoming more and more commonplace as time goes on, and as technology plays a more integral role in our children’s lives. It’s my mission to help others avoid the pain we went through, or at least minimise the pain.
Internet addiction is only one danger of internet usage for your children. After my personal experience I soon realised that not only was I in a position to help you and other parents in dealing with internet addiction, but I could do enough research to help you tackle all the other risks your children face online (seeing inappropriate content, monitoring their activities, maintaining privacy, social media usage, cyber bullying and so on).
The consequences of getting in trouble online are devastating in many cases. I often find myself in tears reading true stories of online victims, and of behaviour that has occurred as a result of online activities. In this video I explain exactly why it is that I do what I do.
I Know What I’m Talking About
I devote the majority of my working hours learning everything I can about the different aspects of keeping children safe online. I’ve also written a book on this topic (soon to be released on Amazon) and speak publicly to parents at schools, to increase their knowledge and help them keep their children safe online. I find the best information available from the best sources online, and I’ve been doing this now for years. No matter who you are or how intelligent you are, you can’t spend that sort of time learning about a topic from numerous experts – or write a book about it – without acquiring an in-depth knowledge of that topic.
I am not a child psychologist or psychiatrist, and I don’t use jargon to try to impress you. I’m simply a mum who cares deeply for the welfare of your family, who is devoting her time to collating the best information available on the topic of internet safety, and who can deliver that knowledge to you in a digestible format and in the shortest time frame possible, to achieve the objective of keeping children safe.
No matter what I say, I realise that sometimes it’s better to hear it from someone else. Here are a few testimonials I’ve received from parents who have completed the Peaceful Digital Parenting Solution, or parts of it.
Ruth’s done the legwork to make it very easy for me to just get on with the job of being the best parent I can! It sounds cheesy, but I now have a lot more practical knowledge and step by step instructions on how to implement some common sense rules regarding my children and their safe use of technology. Even the first session gave me practical tools to bond with my kids using technology, not be alienated by it all. Thanks for all your advice and experience Ruth, I know it will help me and my family. – Helen, Australian mother of 2
What Ruth has taught me…and I’m definitely going to implement as this is going to save the relationship between me and my 8 yr old son…is such a crucial gift that she gives to the world. We as parents need to know how to speak the language that our children are learning on online games before they will listen to us and connect with us. – Dr V, Belgian mother of 2
…followed Dr V’s comments 2 weeks after sharing some of the Solution with her:
Ruth’s process isn’t just something that can be used for parents and children in a family setting, but it’s a philosophy that can be used broad spectrum. That ability and techniques, strategies on how to move out of my agenda, and be more in present time for the person, child or people I’m with, so that I can actually connect with them…I would strongly recommend that that’s just a wonderful process that is useful for all of us in this busy world. – Dr Gerry, Chiropractor, Yoga Teacher and NLP Practitioner
I’m Out There!
If you don’t yet know who I am and want to know more, you’ll find more information from me via videos on YouTube, and can subscribe there to be alerted of new videos as they’re created. You can also find more on my Facebook page Helping Children Through Technology. Alternatively if you just google my brand “Peaceful Digital Parenting” you should find me there in the search results.
If you’d like to take the next step towards keeping your children safe online through the Peaceful Digital Parenting Solution, the next step is to book in a call with me here. The purpose of that call is to get to know each other, clarify your needs, and to determine if the Solution is a good fit for you.
If you know of anyone else who may be interested in keeping their 5-12 year old children safe online please feel free to share this post with them. Let’s work together to keep our children safe online 🙂